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jackalope
06-17-2009, 10:13 PM
Once upon a time, a guy asked a girl 'Will you marry me?' The girl
said, 'NO!' And the guy lived happily ever after and rode motorcycles and
went fishing and hunting and played golf a lot and drank beer and scotch
and had tons of money in the bank and left the toilet seat up and passed gas
whenever he wanted.

The End


Credit: bdquick

wolfracer
06-18-2009, 06:37 AM
Wow-- Trouble in paradise?

JCO
06-18-2009, 01:13 PM
SOOOooooooo.... you're the guy that passed her up...!!!! Well....Mister man of leisure and good times...I've been looking for you...! Why..? Because I'm the one that married her and... :evil:

I hold you accountable for my miserable life....! :shock:

1) No motorcycle (she says bicycle riding is healthier)
2) No hunting (she says you just want to go camping with the guy, drink beer and tell dirty jokes)
3) No fishing (she would never eat a fish I caught because she says you can never tell what that fish has been eating and the stink)
4) Don't even mention golf (she says if I want something to chase around on the grass, get the push mower out and chase it around the yard) 5)No booze of any kind what-so-ever (she and I got plastered one time and she got naked in public making a complete fool of herself so she's punishing me for it)
6) As for money in the bank...the last time I went into the bank was to get a 5th mortgage on our house to build a mother-in-law cottage (bigger than the house I live in I might add) because her mother is coming to stay. (I was informed of this after her mother had already been here and living in the spare bedroom for the past 3 months)
7) And lord help me if I EVER leave the toilet seat up
8) Or even try to sneak a chance at blowing an ill wind anywhere in the house.

So, what's your address, I have a couple things I want to drop off as soon as I can get both of them packed...!!! 8-)

THE BEGINNING (for you) :lol: :lol: :lol: :mrgreen:

wolfracer
06-18-2009, 05:52 PM
LOL Too funny.

badflash
06-18-2009, 06:31 PM
Next time cut out the middle man. Find some ugly fat chick you hate & give her half your stuff.

jackalope
06-18-2009, 09:20 PM
SOOOooooooo.... you're the guy that passed her up...!!!! Well....Mister man of leisure and good times...I've been looking for you...! Why..? Because I'm the one that married her and... :evil:

I hold you accountable for my miserable life....! :shock:

1) No motorcycle (she says bicycle riding is healthier)
2) No hunting (she says you just want to go camping with the guy, drink beer and tell dirty jokes)
3) No fishing (she would never eat a fish I caught because she says you can never tell what that fish has been eating and the stink)
4) Don't even mention golf (she says if I want something to chase around on the grass, get the push mower out and chase it around the yard) 5)No booze of any kind what-so-ever (she and I got plastered one time and she got naked in public making a complete fool of herself so she's punishing me for it)
6) As for money in the bank...the last time I went into the bank was to get a 5th mortgage on our house to build a mother-in-law cottage (bigger than the house I live in I might add) because her mother is coming to stay. (I was informed of this after her mother had already been here and living in the spare bedroom for the past 3 months)
7) And lord help me if I EVER leave the toilet seat up
8) Or even try to sneak a chance at blowing an ill wind anywhere in the house.

So, what's your address, I have a couple things I want to drop off as soon as I can get both of them packed...!!! 8-)

THE BEGINNING (for you) :lol: :lol: :lol: :mrgreen:

:lol: :lol: :lol: You're too much :lol: :lol: :lol: great comeback ;) ROTFL

JCO
06-19-2009, 04:05 AM
ROTFL.......?????? I'm not up with all this, what is it? :oops:

wolfracer
06-19-2009, 06:29 AM
Rolling on the floor laughing

JCO
06-19-2009, 06:48 AM
I Learned this from a very tiny set of books of rhymes and limericks. My grandmother started teaching me to read when I was about 4 and she bought me the books to use to learn how to read and I have never forgotten this one; additionally I still have those tiny books

A flea and a fly in a flue
Were imprisoned, so what could they do?
Said the flea, “let us fly."
Said the fly, “let us flee”
So they flew through a flaw in the flue.
note: (a flue is a chimney for those of you who don't remember)

mommyhen42
06-21-2009, 01:51 PM
Once upon a time, a guy asked a girl 'Will you marry me?' The girl
said, 'NO!' And the guy lived happily ever after and rode motorcycles and
went fishing and hunting and played golf a lot and drank beer and scotch
and had tons of money in the bank and left the toilet seat up and passed gas
whenever he wanted.

The End


Credit: bdquick
Hey I have the same problem.... Only I'm female... :lol:
hubby WON't fish, hell he won't even eat sushi after I went fishing because he feels guilty.
I can't hunt anymore, can't walk that far but I do raise rabbits and he can't eat what he meets so I get jokes about why I cant see a scary movie but I can kill an animal... LOL
well you get the idea

jackalope
06-21-2009, 01:56 PM
Once upon a time, a guy asked a girl 'Will you marry me?' The girl
said, 'NO!' And the guy lived happily ever after and rode motorcycles and
went fishing and hunting and played golf a lot and drank beer and scotch
and had tons of money in the bank and left the toilet seat up and passed gas
whenever he wanted.

The End


Credit: bdquick
Hey I have the same problem.... Only I'm female... :lol:
hubby WON't fish, hell he won't even eat sushi after I went fishing because he feels guilty.
I can't hunt anymore, can't walk that far but I do raise rabbits and he can't eat what he meets so I get jokes about why I cant see a scary movie but I can kill an animal... LOL
well you get the idea
:lol: :lol: I don't eat rabbits either, I'm on your hubby's side ..... to me they're just a fluffy rat with a short tail :lol: :lol: Skin a rabbit, and skin a wharf rat, cut off their tails and lay them side-by-side, you can't tell the difference ;)

badflash
06-21-2009, 02:01 PM
Welcome back Momyhen! We've missed you!

JCO
06-21-2009, 05:37 PM
Mommyhen,

Welcome home and back to the show...we all missed you greatly.... :mrgreen: